Echoes and Silence...

There's this show I've been told I resemble. I resemble a character in some aspect, and there has also been some storyline parallel. Being in one of my 'dusk moods' this evening, I decided to watch some fiction that really doesn't make my life look all that bad, cause well, that tends to either enhance the 'dusk mood' or make me feel better. But tonight, there was a disturbing revelation involved with the viewing.

I randomly selected a disc from season 3. In this random episode I watched, the father of a supporting character died. And while I mourned the similarities of of the 'lost cause' and the death from asphyxiation, it hit me.

These callouses that have formed from the two years of damage control my life turned into... are just that. A tough, thick, portion of epidermis to keep my nerves from any sensitivity or pain.

All of that bullshit was the trial run. That was just the tremor before the big one. Its coming. It may be a few years off yet, but its on its way. Life has recently been easy and enjoyable for the most part. That just doesn't sit well when you're me.

Something wicked this way comes.

...Patience and Grace. And all of these moments, I'll never replace.

[and all i want is to be home]